Johnny's Diary
by aims80
Summary: "I suppose it's kind of geeky to have a diary, certainly not tough. But that's me." Basically this is Johnny's diary a little before and during the events in the novel. Please R&R.
1. Authors note

"Johnny's Diary."  
  
Authors note: I know I was planning on writing the next story in the Curtis Saga, and I will when I can find the motivation (in it Pony's going to be all grown up and finished college), however this idea came to me just today. This story is, in case it wasn't obvious from the title, Johnny's diary. I always got the impression of Johnny as a very deep person, and it occurred to me he could be the sort of person to write in a diary. Its going to begin probably before the novel, but will include the events from the novel in it also.  
  
I won't be posting chapters all that often since at the moment I'm still in recovery mode with the whole rehab/psyio stuff, and on top of that it's the end of the semester for Uni, so I've got a take home exam to write next week, as well as an essay (the lecturer decided it wasn't fair to make me do the take-home exam since I've missed so much so she said I could write an essay instead), then in a few weeks a sit down exam, and a winter intensive. But having said that, I'm going to try to write as often as I can. 


	2. One

"Johnny's Diary."

Dear Diary, or does that sound too nerdy? 

I suppose a lot of people would think a guy having a diary, or a journal, was pretty stupid anyway, wouldn't they? But I actually got the idea from none other than "Adrian Mole's Diary" when we were studying it in English, and then it was further reinforced when it was mentioned by the guidance counselor that perhaps I write things down in an effort to get them off my chest. I was pretty apprehensive at first needless to say, since I suppose it's kind of geeky to have a diary, certainly not tough. But that's me. I know the gang would argue with me if they heard me say that, but I'm not really one of them. I'm different. My name is Johnny Cade, I'm pretty small, and I've got black hair, black eyes and a tanned face. I don't talk much, but that doesn't mean I'm not thinking. I don't want to sound like I'm fishing for sympathy, but I haven't had the easiest of lives, and I still don't. My parents aren't exactly the parental kind as you're bound to see sooner or later in here. That's why the gang are so important to me I think- they are in a sense my family. The rest of the gang are an interesting lot, and it seems I'm always changing my mind on how I feel about them. 

Darrel Curtis, we call him Darry, is probably the leader if we could say we had one. Darry is the eldest of three children and he's got a heck of a lot of responsibility. When the Curtis' parents died he was left in charge, and sometimes I think it gets a bit much for him and he takes it out by being extra bossy, but I'm sure that's only because he cares. Darry's a pretty big guy- just over six feet and he's got broad shoulders and is muscular. He looks as though he can handle the weight of the world, but he's human just like the rest of us, as I've already sort of pointed out. Darry played football in school, and he was darn good. He's got dark brown hair, and cool blue green eyes, and when he turns them on you in a piercing gaze you tend to tell him what he wants to know. Darry could have gone on to college but then things changed and he had no choice but to get a job. I think he works long and hard hours, but I don't think I have ever heard him complain. He's accepted his lot in life.

Sodapop, or Soda as he is known, Curtis, is the next of the Curtis' boys, and I've always thought he was as different from Darry as can be, but I've sort of realised lately that he's not- he might not act like it, but Soda's got a good head on his shoulders like Darry, he just doesn't have to take the responsibility that Darry does so he tends to act up, joke around more. He's shorter than Darry and slimmer since he didn't play football and never bothered building up his muscles. Unlike Darry his hair a sort of brown-gold color and he has dark brown eyes, which tend to always be dancing and laughing at something. Soda works in a garage with another member of the gang, Steve Randle, and everyone loves him. He's always up for some fun, and often you think he's drunk, but he hasn't even had a beer or anything, he loves life in general. He's also the one who seems to protect Pony from Darry. Not that Darry means to get annoyed at Pony- he just does, and Soda seems to be the peacemaker there, perhaps he does it with his joking manner, I'm not really sure?

Then there's Ponyboy Curtis, otherwise known as Pony, the youngest Curtis. I think Pony has it the hardest being the youngest of the family, and the gang, and therefore being more likely to have Darry on his back about things, such as school. But Pony's really smart and he deserves to go on to college, as Darry reminds him on countless occasions. I know Pony gets annoyed at the way Darry treats him as a kid sometimes, but I think he knows Darry's just trying to protect him, and perhaps he's overcompensating for the lack of parental supervision? Pony looks different to Darry and Soda as well- his light brown hair is almost red, and he has grey-green eyes. He's probably the closest one to me in terms of personality, since sometimes he can be pretty quiet and thoughtful. I know it's hard for Pony being the youngest in the group, and when Darry, and Steve treat him like that it makes it even harder, but he's got more guts than me (not that I'm really saying anything by that- everyone is braver than me!). I've noticed that Steve and Pony don't get along all that well, but I'm not really sure why?

Next I think I'll mention Steve Randle, Soda's best friend. Steve strikes me as an interesting person, both in looks and personality. His hair is pretty tuff- he keeps it in these complicated swirls. He's cocky, he's arrogant, and he can be a real smart arse, but when the chips are down he always sticks up for anyone in the gang- even Pony, albeit in a limited capacity there. I don't know why, but I don't seem to know Steve as well as I know some of the others. Maybe there's an aloofness there, like he doesn't want anyone to get too close. Dallas Winston, Dally, is similar, but at the same time we know pretty much there is to know about him since he doesn't have a problem telling us what he has been doing. Steve's big talent is cars, hence his job at the garage, he knows everything there is to know about them, including how to steal them, or bits of them. I have to give Steve this though- he's always nice enough to me. He never yells at me, or puts me down, in fact he's almost brotherly in the way he treats me, like I need his protection.

Since I've already briefly mentioned him, I'll talk about Dallas, or Dally, Winston next. Dallas is the hard one of the group. He's really tough, he's been in jail and has no problem with pulling a blade on anyone, or fighting or stealing. His hair is the palest blonde, and his eyes are an ice-cold blue, not only in color, but also in features. He spent three years in New York awhile back, and that was probably the catalyst for the way he behaves. I said he was aloof before, and he is, in the way that he can be incredibly cold and hard, and sometimes even scary. But at the same time I don't think he has ever raised his voice at me, and we know all there is to know about him- maybe even sometimes too much? Dally is the only one of the group who is really wild- I've seen him take on three or four socs at once and come out of it the better. We all fight, rumble, where we live. It's always us greasers against the socs, but when Dally fights, it's as though he could care less if he or someone else dies in the fight. 

Last, but certainly not least, is Two-Bit Mathews. Two-Bit isn't his real name of course, his real name is Keith, but nobody calls him that, he's Two-Bit because he always has to get his say in, his two bobs worth. Interestingly Two-Bit is the eldest of the group, but he sure doesn't act it. He's pretty tall and stocky, with rusty colored hair, grey eyes and a big grin. Two-Bit thinks life is nothing more than a joke, and he loves to spend time shoplifting, and being smart to all coppers. The most interesting thing about Two-Bit in my opinion, is that he is still at school, and still a junior! He loves school and if he spent the rest of his life there I don't think he'd mind at all. He also loves blondes and fights, anything which he could laugh about. Two-Bit loves to tease everyone and since we all know him so well we don't care. Even I laugh when he teases me because I know he's doing it because he cares, not because he doesn't like me. The best thing about Two-Bit is that he always kept the gang laughing, even at times when we didn't feel like laughing.

So there you go that's us- the gang. I've just looked up from this book at the clock on my wall and realised there is no time to write any more- it's almost eleven thirty and I've been sitting here writing for quite awhile. Don't think all of my entries are going to be mini-essays, and as long as this, I just wanted to get the gang introduced before going on, since they're such an important part of my life. The last thing I need is Dad coming in here and getting annoyed at me for not being asleep. He just got laid off his latest job, so he spends his time sitting round drinking and getting mad at the whole world- including me. Dad belts me round a lot, but Mom's never stood up for me- she's too scared of him I think. Of course she doesn't really like me any better than he does, and she's not exactly afraid to show it. The thing is she does it with words, and he does it with his fists. On that cheerful note I'm going to bed. 

J.C


	3. Two

"Johnny's Diary."

Dear Diary (Again being nerdy, but not really caring since nobody's going to read this),

Today could only be described as an average day. 

I slept in this morning and was running late for school. I didn't think Dad would be up since he was up and drinking last night, but for some reason he was, and he wasn't too impressed that I was running late. 

He didn't hit me though, just mentioned that I better get my act in gear or I wouldn't be hanging around with those hoodlums I hang around with. "No good, the bloody lot of them." He told me as I rushed around the kitchen making lunch. 

I bit my lip (something I am getting better at lately) and said nothing. It wasn't worth reminding him that families like the Curtis' had it hard, and they coped without drinking and beating each other up. And that Darry, in his few years working, had held down one single job, something Dad hadn't done for years! 

"Take that Dallas Winston. Mark my words Johnny, he's a bad one. He'll end up back in jail, and for a lot longer than he's ever been in it before." Dad continued as I thankfully finished making my lunch. We didn't have the money for me to buy it at school so I usually made my own, although it wasn't a rare occasion when I went without completely. 

I left the house, and left Dad to his own tirades. I felt a brief moment of pity for Mom when she got up and hoped he didn't take his anger out on her, but in all honesty Mom's never been much of a Mom to me, so I don't feel pain when he starts on her. 

My average day continued with me being late for homeroom and being berated by the teacher in front of the entire class. "If you can't be on time in future Johnny Cade perhaps it would be better if you just didn't come?" She suggested. "Or maybe I might have to speak to your parents about it?"

I lowered my head to the desk and said nothing. I didn't think it would help my case to point out that my parents wouldn't care what I did. Someone did though.

"I don't think they're going to care about it." A soc up the back commented. "I don't think Johnny's parents, like most greasers, care about what he does, or doesn't do as the case may be."

Other socs snickered, and I felt a few sympathetic looks coming from other greasers in the classroom, but I still kept my head down, trying to show them that I wasn't at all concerned about their smart comments. And it wasn't like they were lying, was it? Although Dad might be likely to smack me around a bit, before forgetting about it. And it wasn't like I needed any sympathy- after all, the soc who'd spoke was completely right!

Average moment number three came in history when I got an essay back. We'd been studying the civil war and told to write on whatever aspect we wanted. I'd written on the carpetbaggers, the scallawags who had profited from the war by stealing and selling from both sides. The essay had interested me, which meant that I thought it had turned out pretty well, especially when you consider the fact that I'd had to write it in the dark since one of my parents had forgotten to pay the electricity bill and it was a few days before it was eventually paid. And in the middle of that my parents argued twenty-four hours a day about who actually had been the guilty party. Apparently not; I got a C which dropped my grade point average down a few marks. It wasn't like I was extremely smart or anything, but I was certainly smarter than that. And I knew that the only way of escaping this crap life was to get to college. But it was sort of like a catch twenty-two situation. My homelife was not exactly conducive to study. Pony had once suggested I move into the Curtis' house, but I had shook my head. It wasn't like they were well off, let alone able to afford another person there. Although my parents would probably have loved me being gone. On the nights when I stayed out at one of the gang, or even in the streets, they never complained. 

So my mood was far from great at lunchtime when I met with Pony and Two-Bit, the only ones in our group still at school. We went outside so that we could have a smoke and I complained about my history mark.

Two-Bit was in his usual fine form and told me that I had to get crap marks or else I wouldn't be stuck here forever with him. Some people at our school thought it was funny that there was an eighteen year old junior, but others thought it was great, and that Two-Bit was a complete legend. He won over a lot of people with his fun, joking attitude. 

"That's all right for you. You don't live in my house." I muttered. 

"You think my mom's easy to live with?" Two-Bit asked. "Wait until you meet her latest boyfriend. He's acting all father figure with me, actually tried to ground me the other night."

I snorted with laughter. "What did you do?"

"Debating beating him up or pulling a blade on him, but then opted for the safe choice of climbing out my window. Mom saw me sneak home later but she didn't say anything of course." Two-Bit replied. 

Pony was looking thoughtful. "I sometimes wonder, if things had been different, would my mom have been like yours…."

"Not a chance." Two-Bit said, flicking his cigarette away. "Pony your mom was a champion."

"Yeah," I agreed as I finished my smoke and pulled out my lunch. "She was great. She made the best chocolate cake ever."

Pony nodded. "Yeah you're right. She was great wasn't she?"

We changed the topic as some other greasers came over and we got into a conversation about how much we hated the socs, but I was looking at Pony thoughtfully. It was the first time I had ever heard him express even something slightly negative about his mother, and it had surprised me. Pony's parents had been great. His Dad had worked long hours, but he was never grumpy, and all the boys adored him. The rest of us all admired him. Pony's mom didn't work, and whenever we came home from school there was always some tasty treat waiting for us. When they'd died it had hit us almost as hard as it had hit the Curtis' boys. 

The bell rang signaling the end of lunch period and we made our way back inside talking about plans for after school. Pony and Two-Bit debated certain things before deciding instead to go down to the garage where Soda and Steve worked and hang there for awhile.

"What about you Johnny? You going to come?" Two-Bit asked.

I thought about it. It was certainly a more attractive prospect than going home, but then I thought about my terrible history mark, and my English assignment coming up. College was really going to be my only escape, and I couldn't let go of that dream of I'd be stuck at home forever. "Nah, I've got some homework to do."

Two-Bit rolled his eyes, but Pony understood. He was, like I've probably already mentioned, a pretty smart kid, and it was more than obvious he'd end up with the marks to go to college if he could work out how to afford it. But I needed a scholarship or that was it. There was no way my parents would be able to afford to send me to college, even though they would have loved the idea of sending me away for such a long period of time. So, as much as I liked spending time with the gang I was going to have to put some major work into this assignment to get my average back up to where it was before the C. I know that probably sounds like I'm making more of a deal of the whole thing than I need to, but surely if you lived where I live, with who I live you'd be the same. If I don't get out of there for college I may as well just die. 

There was one good thing about this day though: when I got home my parents weren't there, they'd gone out, so I got some quality homework time, and made myself eggs and toast for dinner before getting back to the homework. As I write this I've actually almost finished the assignment, and I think it's pretty good because of there being no distractions and all. So maybe once it's done I can spend some time with the gang. 

I'm going to bed now, don't want to be late up in the morning in case one of my parents is up. I wish Dad would hurry and get another job. Things would be far more pleasant around here. Although even despite his talent for getting fired frequently Dad always seems to find work pretty quickly so that's something. 

J.C


	4. Three

[A/N. At the start of this story I said I would be putting in events from in the book and they will come into it soon.]

****

"Johnny's diary."

Dear diary,

Today was actually a pretty good day. 

When I woke up for school (on time for once) neither of my parents were up. So I had a coffee, made my breakfast and left the house. As I walked to school I thought about the English essay I'd almost finished and college. I know some people's parents make a big deal about getting into college, sort of a "when you go to college" because there's no _if_ there, it's always known. And then some people's parents put so much pressure on them to get good marks and get into the best college there is. And then there's my parents- I don't think they even know what marks I get. They have looked at my grades when I bring home my report card but they've never paid attention to it. When I was younger this used to upset me, that they didn't care, and I used to take them over to the Curtis' house so Mrs. Curtis could look at them. And she'd always hug me and tell me how well I did and that sort of made up for the lack of parental care. Of course now I'm older I don't care what my parents think, or don't think for that matter. After all- it's my life. 

I didn't have to go my math class first period because I had an appointment with the guidance counselor. As a rule these guys are meant to be pains in the butt, but Mr. Harris is pretty cool really. He's only fairly young, and I think he sometimes actually understands what I'm saying. I've been seeing him every two weeks for the last few months, something I keep well hidden from the gang. In their opinion it would be almost like seeing a shrink and a sign of weakness. Well maybe not all of them, Pony and Darry would probably have understood. But I wasn't going to test this by telling them. I told Mr. Harris I had taken his suggestion of writing things down, and had started a diary a few days back, and he was pretty impressed. He explained that it wasn't for him, or anyone else to read, it was just a way of me getting things off my chest and making myself feel better. In front of him on the desk he had a memo he kept glancing at and then finally he tapped it.

"Johnny, you got a C for history. That's unlike you, history's usually one of your better subjects." He broached the subject, putting his hands on the desk, folded and looking at me thoughtfully.

"I had trouble concentrating when I was working on it." I said slowly.

"Your parents fighting?" He asked, nodding to himself as if he already knew the answer. That amused me briefly, that he could know me so well in so little time. 

"Yeah, and the electricity was cut off because one of them didn't pay the bill, so I wrote it by torch." I added.

Mr. Harris sighed. "It's such a shame, you're a talented young man Johnny. I'm sure that if you keep to your standards you're going to be able to get a scholarship to college. Don't let things get in the way though."

"Sometimes it's a bit hard not to." I argued.

"Have you considered spending your lunch hour in the library working on things?"

"I can't." I said automatically. "I spend lunches with Pony and Two-Bit."

Mr. Harris's mouth twitched slightly. "Two-Bit Mathews?" He asked.

"Yeah." I said.

"He's a character isn't he?" Mr. Harris asked. "And he's happily failing again this year."

"Can he stay here forever?" I asked.

"I doubt it. Sooner or later they're going to tell him to leave." Mr. Harris replied.

"That'll break his heart." I said with a shake of my head. 

"Yes." Mr. Harris said. "Well Johnny, you better get going or else you'll be late for history."

"Right," I said standing up and gathering my things together. "Same time in two weeks?"

"If you want." Mr. Harris said. He always said that, like he was giving me the choice of whether I wanted to see him or not, although I had the feeling if I said no I'd still have to go. But like I said, I don't mind it. So I nodded and left the room. 

After school Pony was going to the pictures and he asked me to go with him. 

"What are you going to see?" I asked debating it.

"Anything with Paul Newman in it hopefully." Pony replied.

I had to grin. Pony's got a bit of an obsession with Paul Newman at the moment, but none of us know why precisely. I heard Steve joking that he had a crush on him but Pony didn't bite, so Steve had stopped.

I hesitated. Going to the movies with Pony would have been good, but I wanted to go home and finish off my English essay, so I declined. 

"Soon we're gonna' think you don't want to spend time with us." Pony said, but he was just joking, and I laughed too.

"See ya later." He called as he turned off towards the cinemas and I kept on my way home. 

As I walked home a blue mustang cruised past me and then it came back and someone yelled out "OI GREASER!"

I felt my heart literally skip a beat, but I didn't comment and kept walking, looking away, like Darry had suggested. 

"WANT A BATH GREASER?" They yelled, and I didn't comment again. For reasons which I don't want to go into now and since I don't have the time (I will talk about it later because I believe it's important to get things off my chest, and that's definitely something which is sitting heavily on my chest) socs scare me more than everyone else. To my surprise, and my delight, they drove on, obviously deciding I was no fun, and I breathed a loud sigh of relief. Nonetheless I walked home a little faster.

The last thing which happened today which was good was I found out Dad had gotten another job, so he wouldn't be home when I got up in the morning, nor when I got home from school.

Things are looking up. Of course, I know only too well, things don't always go right for greasers like me.

J.C 


	5. Four

****

"Johnny's diary."

Dear diary,

Today was a pretty good day, and the fact that it's finally the weekend sure helps that. I've only had this diary for almost a week now and I have been sitting thinking about whether or not it's helping me, and I decided for it to help me then I had to tell the truth about some things. Not that I've been lying in here, I haven't, but I should write about some of the experiences which have made me the way I have. In case you haven't worked it out I am going to tell you about the episode with the socs awhile back. In a moment.

First my day: I slept in, and when I got up neither of my parents were in. They do that sometimes on weekend- just take off and then don't come back until late Sunday night, not that I complain. So I put the television on in the lounge room and listened to it while I made myself a huge breakfast. Then I showered, dressed and went over to the Curtis' place. Soda and Darry were both working (they sometimes do on weekends) and Pony was just sitting in the kitchen with a coffee debating how to spend the day. He tried to rope me into going back to the movies- he wanted to see that Paul Newman movie he'd already seen.

"Maybe Steve's right- maybe you're in love with him." I teased Pony sitting down at the table near him and stretching my legs out.

"Nah, he just looks tough, that's all." Pony explained. "So, what do you want to do?"

"I don't know, just hang I guess?" I replied. 

There was the sound of someone coming into the house and a few minutes later Two-Bit burst in. "Hey kids." He greeted us.

"Kids." Pony repeated with scorn.

"So, what y'all doing today?" Two-Bit asked, lighting a cigarette.

"Nothing." Pony said with a sigh. "We can't think of anything we want to do."

"Well it so happens you're in luck." Two-Bit said with a big grin. "I've got something to do, and I'd like y'all to come with me."

"What?" Pony asked, his eyes narrowing slightly with suspicion. Unlike say Dally Two-Bit wasn't a criminal, but he was sure full of mischief. 

"Come and you will see." Two-Bit said mysteriously.

Pony looked at me and I shrugged. Why not?

So we followed Two-Bit out of the house and down the road towards the mall. "Today we're going to teach some pain in the butt socs a lesson." He said.

When he said that I felt my palms begin to sweat. I wasn't so sure I liked that plan, it would be two days in a row I'd had some dealings with the socs and that would be two days too many. I don't like to think I'm a coward, but when it comes to the socs, unless we are in a big gang, I don't like to interfere with them. In my opinion things would be a lot better if we each stayed on our own. (I am getting to my explanation of why I, unlike the rest of the gang, am not so tough when it comes to socs.)

"What have they done now?" Pony asked.

"Apart from being born? They were doing wheelies and things in the road last night, couldn't bloody sleep." Two-Bit explained as we came upon the mall parking lot. Now we know that every Saturday morning the socs gather in the TGI Fridays here so we also know that their cars are going to be parked in the lot. Usually in a group so they can show off their great cars.

Two-Bit led the way over to where the socs cars were sitting. My eyes flicked over a blue mustang and I quickly looked away. Two-Bit was eyeing my thoughtfully and my eyes met his. I was waiting for the look of disgust I deserved, but instead I got a look of sympathy. "Johnnycake you want to be the lookout?" He asked, and I nodded trying not to show my eagerness. 

So whilst I was lookout Two-Bit and Pony slashed as many tyres as they could, and then we hurried off to see Soda and Steve and tell them what we'd done. Soda thought it was pretty funny.

"I'd like to have been there when they all come out and see their cars." He said wistfully. 

The day dwindled away and we moved from the garage to the Curtis' place, where Darry was home from work. When we told him what we'd done he shook his head. "They're going to want to get us for it." He said.

"Heck Darry they don't know who done it." Pony said. "It could have been almost anyone."

I sat silently thinking about that, and then before it got too late I decided to go home. I told them it was because I had a headache, but in reality I thought it was better to be inside before the socs went looking for whoever had done the damage to their cars, or failing that, a greaser who was out and about on his own.

So now I am sitting here in the kitchen writing in this and it is time for me to tell you about what happened to me about three and a half months ago:

My parents had been fighting pretty badly and I was worried I was going to be dragged into it so I decided to head to the Curtis' place. Soda would be on his way home, and Pony and Darry would probably be home, so I decided that I might have to spend the night there. They wouldn't mind though, they never did. On the way to the Curtis' place there is a wide, open space where we play football, have rumbles, or just hang out. I decided it would be good to practice a few football kicks with the football we kept hidden and I was just getting it when I heard a voice behind me. "Greaser." Someone said, and I felt my heart skip a beat. I turned around slowly to discover that there was a blue mustang full of socs, and worse they were getting out of the car. 

I tried to be brave, and I told them where to go and then I started to run, but they were on me before I got too far. Normally in a rumble I have no problems with fighting the socs, but this was different- the odds were a lot worse. One of them, who appeared to be the leader, began to tell me all the terrible things they were going to do to me. I didn't let them see I was scared, but inside I was terrified. Nonetheless I told them what I thought of socs, and that was it. They all began to hit me then, but the worst was the leader who had rings on his hand which cut me pretty bad. In the struggle my jacket got pulled off me, and eventually they left me. I managed to crawl across the lot, hoping to make it to the Curtis' place, but before I knew it I passed out.

The next thing I knew the gang were there, the whole lot of them, and I heard Dally swearing, and felt Soda leaning close to me. "Johnny? Hey, Johnnycake."

"Soda?" I whispered.

"Yeah it's me. Don't talk. You're gonna' be okay."

I wanted to tell him what had happened, and most importantly tell him that I wasn't a coward, that there had been too many of them, and they'd threatened me, but it hurt too much and I started to cry. Soda held me then, like I was a baby and after I had managed to get my story out the gang swore revenge. 

Thinking back now it's interesting to note that they all reacted in different ways. Dally was really pissed off about the whole thing, and he went and got hold of a soc, who didn't have anything to do with it, and beat him half to death for revenge. Two-Bit spent ages trying to make me, and the gang laugh. Soda acted like a big brother and he was constantly making sure I was all right. Steve was unusually silent. Darry was like a parent. Pony was the only one who seemed to be shaken up by what had happened. He was pretty pale, and he stuck close to me for awhile after it. 

Anyway, that's why I'm scared of the socs. That's why I'm not like the rest of the gang. 

J.C


	6. Five

[A/N. I am back at Uni next week so I wont be updating all that often because as well as homework I've been writing a novel which is so far up to nearly 38,000 words. Also, this is the last chapter from before the novel; the next one is going to be at the start of the novel, but you might have been able to tell that from this chapter?]

"Johnny's diary."

Dear diary,

It's not night as I write this, but rather the afternoon and I had some spare time on my hands so I thought I might write in here now. Although today was a pretty boring day so there's not a lot to say.

Today I broached the subject of having a diary with Pony as we walked to school, without letting on that I'd started one. He thought about it for a moment before saying "I'd like to have something like that, just to get my thoughts out on paper….but then what's the chances Soda'd find it and give me heaps? Why Johnny? You got a diary?"

I snorted. "Nah, I don't have an interesting enough life to write in one." I replied. "Do you remember all those adventure stories we used to read when we were kids? I wish our life was like that."

Pony nodded as we walked through the school gates. "Yeah, it'd be cool if something exciting happened around here." He agreed. "What are you doing after school?"

"Nothin', just hanging." I said with a shrug as we reached our lockers and pulled out the books we needed. I was standing near mine debating whether to take my history textbook or not (as often as not we didn't use it in class and it was a heavy thing I didn't want to carry if I didn't have to) when a bunch of socs walked past, and one reached over me to slam my locker shut. "Oops, sorry there greaser." He said. 

I didn't say anything, just opened my locker and got the book out, but Pony was glaring at their retreating backs. "We shouldn't let them get away with that sort of stuff." He complained.

"Leave it be…there was no damage done was there?" I asked, hoping Pony wouldn't think I was a coward, but of course he didn't. 

"They just really annoy me, that's all." Pony said as we now walked to his locker. "So anyway, I'm going to the movies after school, what do you say?"

I thought about it for a moment and then shook my head. "I can't afford it." I said.

"I'll lend you the money." Pony offered.

It was nice of him to offer seeing as how he wasn't really all that more well off than I was, but I still declined. I'm not much into movies, and Pony's the sort of person who sits there and stares at the screen rapt the entire way through. I remember once when Pony and Soda went to the movies, and then Soda snuck me in through the back door, and Soda commented on how unrealistic the movie was, and Pony was disgusted with him. "Your problem is you've got no imagination." He told him after we'd gone back out into the daylight. After that day Pony didn't take Soda to the movies much- he was too restless to sit and watch something for a few hours. 

"Darry'll tell me off for goin' alone, but who cares?" Pony said, as we reached his classroom. "Not like I'm going to wait for him to come home and then spend ages trying to convince him to come with me and have him be bored stiff the entire time."

"But you went alone the other day." I said confused.

Pony grinned. "I did, and Darry found out and he was furious. He said things have been too quiet between us and the socs lately and that we don't want to tempt fate." 

I laughed. "Trust Darry." I said, shaking my head.

"Yeah, but what he doesn't know won't hurt him. If I go to the movies as soon as I finish school and be home before Darry gets home and he'll be none the wiser." Pony explained with a grin. 

A few socs pushed us out of the way to get into the classroom, and I noticed one of them looking at Pony thoughtfully for a moment, but then he saw me looking at him and turned away. 

The warning bell rang. "I better get to class." I said, and I hurried off.

The rest of the day was pretty mundane. I got a B+ on my English assignment, which was something of a relief as it made up slightly for the bad mark in history the other week. One of the Sheppard gang got into a fight with a soc in the cafeteria at lunchtime, and came off better until he got hauled into the principal's office where apparently he was told he had used up his last warning and was to be expelled. Of course nothing happened to the soc. I came home to find Dad at work and Mom passed out on the couch. I leant over and removed the half-empty bottle of scotch from her, as well as the burnt out cigarette dangling from her hand. As a kid I always longed for a normal family, like the Curtis's, but now I know that's never going to happen. My best shot at being normal is getting out of here and going away to college. 

The sun's finally starting to set as I finish this off and…. Hold on a second, Two-Bit's hollering at my window telling me we're going down the shops to hang out. It's a school night and I probably shouldn't, but I will.

J.C.


End file.
